For years I felt incredibly uncomfortable whenever the subject of savings came up. I had debt and felt so far away from the possibility of ever having anything saved! Being told I should have spare money put aside was like being told I should achieve the impossible!! What feelings does the word 'savings' bring up for you? I guess for some it may raise a smile and a fabulous feeling of security, excitement or possibility! For others - hmm not so much! For me, I rather unfortunately associated it with the following:
So you can imagine that when I heard the 's' word, with all of the above unpleasant feelings attached, I never wanted to spend any time dwelling on it. I felt much happier avoiding it altogether. It was taboo and I'd find myself getting defensive or cagey if the subject ever came up. So - what's wrong with just carrying on avoiding it? If you're currently not facing up to the whole savings issue, like I was, and you want to be wealthy then you need to pay attention here! Someone who is not comfortable with having savings is someone who is not comfortable with having excess. That means, that regardless of whether you earn £5000 or £5 million a year, you will find a way to spend or get rid of any excess money. You will simply increase your outgoings to match whatever comes in. The action someone can take to 'release' themselves from the 'burden' of excess money can range from subtle to extreme! Here's some examples:
Not having savings can put you in a precarious situation. It can take away your financial power because you have no spare resources for dealing with the unexpected things that crop up in life like a home or car repair bill. It also means you may never have spare money for some of those bigger things you would love in life, such as holidays, retraining yourself, starting your own business...etc. Having to spend out on any of these things, when you have no savings, could easily put your bank account in the red. It's pretty disempowering to always be on the back foot with money like that. I want to be clear on this- I'm not saying there's anything wrong with spending money & enjoying life! After all, what is the point in having money if you're not enjoying yourself!? What we're talking about here is the issue of being uncomfortable with having a buffer. It points to something going on with you - in you - that could really do with being resolved. Something is blocked in your beliefs, thoughts and feelings about having money, and that's never a positive. 'Blocked' doesn't go with 'abundance'. Don't forget - how we do money is how we do everything, so if you're blocked around savings, you may well be blocked in other aspects of your life too. Dig deep - why is having spare money a problem? Did your family have spare money growing up? What did it mean to have spare money or to not have spare money? What were you taught about money when you were growing up? Do you feel quilty about having too much money? If you'd like to start healing on this issue, I've got a suggestion, and it's the exact same way I began resolving my own block on having savings: Start a small savings account and set up a monthly transfer to it, as soon as you're able to. The amount you transfer in is totally up to you. It can be a really small amount like £2 or £5, it doesn't matter. What matters is the shift in your mindset and energy - that it's ok to have spare. After you've got it set up, every now and then try to increase the amount you put away each month! Note down the feelings that come up during the process for you. Are they like the ones I listed for myself above? Or are they different for you? Use my questions above about your experiences of money in your younger years to uncover your feelings and where they come from. Then ask yourself this - what do I need to let go of today, to start feeling comfortable with having excess? Money blocks are pretty much the number one reason why women who should be wealthy, aren't. 'Blocks' are those negative subconscious beliefs that stop you from getting the things you consciously want . I'd love to help you move past those blocks, & get you on track to the fabulous life you truly deserve! . As a Money Breakthrough Coach for Women in Business I have a fabulous system for moving you past old negative beliefs and doubt, and into a mindset where you feel unstoppable! In addition to that I can work with you to create unique and clear heart & soul branding for your business to set you apart from the crowd, how to charge what you're worth & get it...and so much more! Click here to take a look at my amazing 6 month private coaching package 'Heart & Soul Money Glow for Women Entrepreneurs'! If you'd like to have a chat with me to find out more, please use the button below to book a discovery call! I'd love to hear from you! With love, Nikki xI am, & always have been a rather shy introverted person. The moment I realised I was going to have to get comfortable with posting videos of myself on social media to grow my coaching business, was probably the same moment I developed a massive block on the subject! The blockage went on for months and I frustrated myself endlessly with constant heel dragging and excuses as to why I was never ready to do it. It seemed like every woman and her cat were out there happily posting videos, and I just couldn’t figure out why I was finding it so hard! I felt like such a failure and like the online business world just wasn’t for me. It felt like it caused me brain ache & fatigue every time I tried to think about how to create a video and post it. It also seemed like my confusion and ‘stuckness’ about the subject permeated everything else I tried to do in my business. I found it hard to write any new content, I struggled to feel confident before a coaching session because my head felt foggy. I seriously believe that my block on being visible was causing me blocks everywhere in life. It was all a bit miserable. However, I have great news - I’m not stuck anymore! Very recently, I confidently and happily posted my first video on facebook! Now, here I am feeling relieved & creatively free, cracking on with my website blog in a way that I’ve dreamt of doing for months! So how did I get to this point, after being so incredibly blocked?! I’ve listed some of the key moments below that happened to help me turn it around, but before I get to that - if any of this resonates with you and you think you might be stuck on something too, start by dealing with the first 3 key points below: Acknowledge that you are actually stuck! If you are putting something off that deep down know you need to face up to doing..but you’re struggling to make any progression...then acknowledge that that is you being a bit stuck! Maybe you’ve not even realised it until now! Here’s some signs you’ve got a bit of 'stuckness' on something:
Find out why. Find a quiet moment when you can sit down with pen and paper, and ask yourself why you are stalling. Leave the excuses out of it and just be honest with yourself. There might be one reason, or there might be multiple reasons - note down anything that comes up for you! Actually writing it all down can really help you just find some much needed clarity, without that it’s extremely hard to make any progress! Consider if your 'stuckness' is actually because you’re trying to do something that isn’t right for you. With my blockage around doing videos, I knew I had to get over it because... I love coaching! Putting videos out there is one of the best ways to get new clients to decide they want to work with you (especially during a pandemic lockdown where we can’t meet in person) so it felt like a bit of a no-brainer. My desire to succeed in coaching far outweighed my fear of doing a video, so I knew I had to persevere and find a way to push through it. If you are stuck on something that you don’t want, or don’t care much about - ask yourself if it’s really absolutely necessary that you do the thing in the first place. Or, if the situation really is unavoidable, can you see another way to resolve it that doesn’t cause you to feel stuck? So what about the process I went through to 'unstick' around my fear of being visible in a video? I've listed the 6 key areas that helped me move forwards below. These did not necessarily all neatly flow in the below order - it was more a case of everything coming together at once, the below were the critical elements though. 1) I eventually realised I had to do it my own unique way. You’d think this would be a given, because by being me, surely I can only produce things in my own unique way...but no! Turns out I was trying to do what I thought I saw others doing, and that meant I missed out on just bringing my own natural style. I felt awkward and it just didn’t flow for me. Due to that the videos I tried doing were ok, but I never felt happy enough to actually post them on social media. The first major breakthrough was realising that the real issue was figuring out how to be me on camera - not me trying to remember how someone else might do it! The second breakthrough was actually figuring out what ‘being me’ in a video actually meant! I had to give some thought to how I am in real life. If someone was in the room with me instead of that video camera, then I realised I would never feel comfortable pretending I’m ok when I’m not. In real life, if I feel uncomfortable I admit to it! That quickly led to the idea that my first video needed to go back to basics and actually just be about me talking about my struggle with producing a video! As soon as I hit on that idea, the whole process just flowed so easily and before I knew it, I was happily hitting ‘post’ on my first ever social media video for my business! 2) I dedicated time to working out the technical stuff like the equipment I was going to use, and didn't give up until I had a solution that worked. I got a lot quicker at this once I had resolved point 1, because as soon as I felt confident on what the content of my video would be, I felt excited and motivated to get the technical stuff right so I could just get on with it! 3) I studied my idols to see how they did videos and copied some of their techniques! This point obviously works in combination with point 1 - watch and see how the people you like watching are doing it, then find a way to bring your own unique twist to that! 4) I gave up on the pursuit of perfection. If you want & need to get past a block, then you might have to aim for ‘good enough’ instead of ‘perfect’. Seeking perfection is something we often do when we are lacking confidence and potentially doubting our own worth. It’s just another form of procrastination. Are you setting standards that - if you’re honest with yourself - you’re going to seriously struggle to ever achieve? Wouldn’t you feel happier if you just got the ‘stuck thing’ done to a ‘very good’ level - instead of a perfect one? Surely not having it hanging over you as a big-grey-not-done-that-yet-cloud, combined with an amazing sense of achievement once it’s actually completed is an exciting thing to aim for, simply because it’s attainable! I felt that I achieved a kind of perfection when I made the decision to post an imperfect video out into the world - because any kind of perfection for me, needs to involve me actually progressing in my business! Could just actually getting the thing done become part of your view of it being ‘perfect’? 5) I stayed accountable to my coach! I don’t say this to create some cheesy link to then ask you to sign me up as your coach (that comes later….haaaa!) it really is just true that my coach, Joy, set a date by when I would have a video posted out there. Having a challenge with a deadline set like that, where you have to report back to someone you respect, can have a major effect on your chance of actually getting something done. Don’t underestimate accountability - sometimes it is the only driving force that will get you past your own blocks 6) The universe had my back! I quite literally pulled this card twice in a row from my ‘The universe has your back’ cards by Gabrielle Bernstein on two different days in the build up to doing my ‘unstuck’ video which felt like a fab sign to go ahead! I love tuning into signs that I’m on the right track. It can be anything from white feathers, to angel numbers or number plates on cars that you suddenly spot! Look for signs in your life that there is love and support around you, ready for you to take your next step If you are feeling stuck in your business and you just don’t know how to shift into a different gear to get through it, why not book in a discovery call with me! Money breakthrough coaching is all about getting free of old beliefs that hold us back. The focus is on moving our business and ourselves forward in life and ultimately making more money and creating more freedom to spend time doing the things we love! That dream life really can be yours! Book a discovery call using the button below, or email me at [email protected] I can't wait to hear from you! With love, Nikki x |
AuthorWritten by Nikki T, I blog about anything & everything related to clarity, confidence & money breakthroughs! Archives
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