Self doubt has got to be one of the biggest reasons we don't achieve as much as we would like in life & in business.
Reflecting on my own life, I can see that if I'd doubted myself less and believed in myself more I could have achieved so much by now! So annoying! While it's important to learn from the past, dwelling on the 'should's & 'could's' is not a good motivator because it gives us a gloomy sense of all the things we've NOT done - a feeling of disappointment in ourselves. For example I felt so frustrated working in accounts for years, never quite knowing how to escape it. I often used to think to myself "If I'd just believed in myself when I was 18 I would have pursued a career as a writer or a psychologist & wouldn't be in this position!!" (back in the days before I'd even realised I wanted to be a coach!) Thinking like that usually only added to my feeling that I was powerless to change my situation. It gave me such a feeling of "why bother?!"...so I often ended up just sticking with the status quo, doubting that I could do any better. There is such a positive side to doing a bit of reflecting though - it can be powerful! You just have to know how to do it in the right way so that you can use it to motivate, energise & invigorate you! So how do you do that? Try this: Grab some paper & write down a list of all the achievements you can think of that you've made in your life so far. There's no limits on what you should write - put anything & everything that feels significant to you. Here's some of the things that would go into my list:
I could go on & on but I won't...once I start talking about a love of excel spreadsheets & naming all my beloved hamsters from the past it get very VERY dull! Hopefully my list has inspired you to think of all the things you have achieved! Once you've written down every achievement you can think of, stop & reflect on everything you've just listed. Here's some questions for you to reflect on:
Has this exercise left you feeling like you could achieve more? Great! Harness the power of that feeling and consider what you could do today to get you one step closer towards your next achievement! This exercise is very similar to one I work through with my coaching clients. It feels incredible to read your own personal achievements list - out loud - knowing your coach is there celebrating every little detail with you! ( I know because I've done the exercise with my coach!). As a coach I'm here to champion you and remind you that you are wonderful just as you are. Not only that, you have everything you need to achieve those big dreams, within you right now, you just have to be reminded of how to tap into your own strength and find your glow! Learn more about working with me at www.fireflyheartcoaching.com or reply to this email if you'd like to chat! With love, Nikki x Today I thought I'd share a little secret about my coaching, in the shape of a brief but fun exercise you can try today! One of the main reasons to hire a coach is of course to keep momentum going. For so many of us, with the best will in the world it's hard when on our own, to keep our focus & energy on track so we can bring about the transformation we would love. So as a coach, how do I help you kick start your momentum when you feel stuck, unclear or a bit lost during a coaching session? I would pretty much always start out by asking you the same thing - I want to know your 'what' & your 'why'! Here's some questions if you'd like to try this right now: What? What do you want? What's your goal? What are you aiming for? What would you love to have? Why? Why do you want that? Why does it matter to you? What difference will it make to you to achieve that? What will change in your daily life if you achieve that? If you'd like to feel a little boost of energy & clarity today then I seriously encourage you to take 5 minutes right now to write down your answer to one of the 'what' questions and one of the 'why' questions above (even email it back to me if you're in the mood! I'd love to hear from you - no automation here, it'd go straight to my inbox!) It's so important to regularly check in with your 'what' & 'why' because:
My last tip on getting a result from this quick & simple exercise is this - once you have reconnected with your 'what' & your 'why', take a moment to sit or lie down somewhere calm & peaceful, in silence for at least 2 minutes (if you can do longer that's even better). Have in your mind the sense that you're waiting for an answer during this moment of silence. You don't even need to know what the question is - just allow some stillness to see what comes up for you. By doing this you're allowing a connection to your soul's purpose. You've ignited the fire by getting in touch with the reason why you want what you want, now you need to allow your soul to speak to you with whatever it needs to say. When you do this you're allowing some space for a little magic! One of the major reasons why 1:1 coaching works is because you pretty much have to answer me - in person - when I ask questions like the above! Being in a real live coaching session means you can't do that thing that happens when you're reading an email & think "that's a good question - I'll answer that later"...and later never comes! Saying your answers out loud to another human who exists to help you achieve your dreams (me...!) can be so empowering & invigorating! You won't really know the extent of that until you've tried it! If you'd like to know more about what I do, check out my website www.fireflyheartcoaching.com or email me [email protected] - I'd love to hear from you! With love, Nikki x In my last blog post I spoke about getting out of indecisive energy. This week I want to talk about priorities, and how to ensure you focus your valuable time & energy where it needs to be! What do you prioritise in daily life, and is it in line with what you want? What we end up prioritising is key to the life & experiences we end up creating for ourselves. It sounds simple but it's powerful when you stop & think about it! For example - I can't play the piano, but if i prioritised learning to play every day. there's a strong chance I'd quickly improve my skills until I reached a good level of competence! Whereas If I never prioritise learning it, then of course, I'm not going to get any better than my current skill level (which is non-existent!). As another example - if I want to make more money, then I need to prioritise taking actions that are more likely to bring me money such as advertising my business, having conversations with people who may become customers, selling things I no longer need...etc. By prioritising these things there's a strong chance I'm going to increase my money flow. Again, if I don't prioritise actions that help me make money, it makes it a lot less likely that I will gain any extra cash! The trouble is, in the noisy busyness of daily life, there's often a bit of a disconnect between what we think we are prioritising, and what we are actually prioritising.
I often think I've been prioritising working on my business, when truthfully I have been (unintentionally!) prioritising worrying about my business which takes up the same amount of time, but has a very different energy! Worrying about my business means I've been doing a lot of ruminating, self doubting and procrastination, and very little positive action! As per the law of attraction, we get more of what we focus on, so when I'm putting my energy into worry I get more things to worry about! Whereas when I prioritise taking positive actions that move my business forwards...I tend to be pretty successful in making progress! So how do you get clear on where your priorities have been, and then where they need to be going forwards? Here's a quick way to get some answers and resharpen your focus. Grab a pen and some paper and write the answer to the below questions: Part one: On what did you spend most of your time, thoughts, emotion & energy over the last 7 days?
These are you priorities! Now ask yourself, does the above list, match the priorities you thought you had? Part two: Thinking about that amazing dream or goal you have (the one I talked about last week that lights you up!)... what would you need to prioritise to help make that happen? List below! Or, alternatively what do you need to prioritise to enable you to live the life you would truly love to live? List below!
Part three: Which of the above new priorities could you start taking action on this week? How good will it feel at the end of next week when you can look back & know you took another step closer to your dream or goal?! One of the key features of Money Breakthrough Coaching is that it takes the confusion & exhaustion out of trying to reach your goals alone - it can be so hard to stay on course, stay positive and stay focused when you're only accountable to yourself. Our coaching sessions together are all about keeping you on track for success (whatever 'success' looks like for you personally!) - whether that's through clarifying what you actually want and then setting do-able positive steps that move you forwards, or clearing out old negative beliefs and self-imposed barriers! We'll have fun doing it & I know you will feel energised & ready to grab the life you've been dreaming of! It's all there for the taking! Find out more about working with me at www.fireflyheartcoaching.com! With love, Nikki x I wonder how far along you are in achieving that thing you dream about? You know the thing that lights a spark in you, like a little jolt of excitement whenever you think about it? Maybe that thing is increasing your income, or being free to take a holiday whenever you want for as long as you want, maybe it's moving to be bigger home or maybe it's working less hours for more money? Whatever it is, are you somewhere on the path to achieving it or is it currently just feeling like some fantasy concept that will never become your reality? If it's the latter then I'd like to help! I wanted to share something with you that has genuinely helped me start shifting out of daydreaming and into actual action towards achieving my goals.
I'll get straight to it!: Get rid of indecisive energy Indecisive energy can also be thought of as 'overwhelm'. It happens when you have so much going on in your life, that trying to take on anything new or different can just feel like overload. You often end up stuck in limbo wanting to do something but not actually doing it because there's never enough time / energy / brain space to allow you to feel fully ready or able to commit to it. The decision - whatever decision is in front of you at the time - feels too hard to make so you never make it. With indecisive energy, even decisions or actions that should feel exciting can weigh heavily on you. This is because, when already overwhelmed, you experience anything new as just more pressure on your already limited time & energy. It's yet another thing for you to never quite get around to doing or completing which inevitably causes you some kind of feeling of guilt or frustration. You chide yourself for another opportunity missed. You might even find yourself avoiding trying new things or meeting new people because you instinctively sense that it could end up causing you more overwhelm. All of this results in you staying exactly the same. When it comes to money - that means you can stagnate financially. Maybe it means you never look at your finances or take any real steps to improving them. Maybe it means you never look for a new job even though you know it's time. Maybe it's that you never allow yourself to try out a new idea that could seriously benefit you. Everything just goes round and round in a cycle of "I'm not happy...life feels chaotic and busy.... I want to change it...changing it feels too hard & uncomfortable...I'll go back to doing what I was before... I'm not happy...." So how do you get out of this cycle of overwhelm creating more overwhelm? And indecisiveness creating more indecisiveness? The trick is to start making some decisions. It is the only way to make progress. You literally have to CHOOSE your way forwards. The 10 prompts below are perfect ways to start clearing out the mental clutter that contributes to you feeling overwhelmed & indecisive. Start by just working through them - & actually actioning them wherever possible, then see how much better you feel afterwards. 10 ways you can clear your in-between energy: 1. If you've got multiple tabs open in your internet browser - close them. (You can always bookmark pages you don't want to loose) 2. If you have things waiting in online shopping baskets, or if you're watching things on eBay, decide to buy, delete or 'unwatch' them 3. Unsubscribe from magazines and other subscriptions you never have time to read or make use of (beauty boxes, software, online services, apps, tv subscriptions...etc) 4. Unsubscribe from emails that you never have time to read - use the 'block' feature in your inbox if they somehow keep getting through! 5. 'Unfollow' people on social media that are no longer relevant to you so that you stop receiving distracting updates from them 6. Delete any unfinished draft emails sitting in your email account - or finish & send them 7. If something keeps going round & round on your to-do list either do it, erase it or ask someone else to do it. 8. Have you got unclear commitments in your diary? Either commit and book them in or delete them & send apologies 9. Write the text, email or letter that you've been meaning to send your friend or loved one, and get it sent to them today 10. Declutter - donate or sell all those things around your home that you could happily do without I know that once I'd completed the steps above I immediately felt lighter. The more I released all the 'I might...', 'Maybe I should...' & 'If I just...' energy surrounding the above distractions, the lighter & more spacious my head felt! It's like practising your decision making skills in subtle easy ways that then empower you to move on & make bigger decisions. Within days of doing the above clearing out, I arrived at a decision for my business that I'd been trying to make for months. No coincidence! Give it a try and see what happens! As a Money Breakthrough Coach I'm here to shift those feelings of being stuck, confused or overwhelmed so that you can instead experience powerful, energising clarity that will get you effortlessly on the path towards your goals & dreams. My coaching packages are designed to get you from where you are now, into the money freedom I know you'd love to have, in a way that will feels fun & exciting for you! Take a look a my website www.fireflyheartcoaching.com or email me if you'd like to learn more! With love Nikki x |
AuthorWritten by Nikki T, I blog about anything & everything related to clarity, confidence & money breakthroughs! Archives
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