I am, & always have been a rather shy introverted person. The moment I realised I was going to have to get comfortable with posting videos of myself on social media to grow my coaching business, was probably the same moment I developed a massive block on the subject! The blockage went on for months and I frustrated myself endlessly with constant heel dragging and excuses as to why I was never ready to do it. It seemed like every woman and her cat were out there happily posting videos, and I just couldn’t figure out why I was finding it so hard! I felt like such a failure and like the online business world just wasn’t for me. It felt like it caused me brain ache & fatigue every time I tried to think about how to create a video and post it. It also seemed like my confusion and ‘stuckness’ about the subject permeated everything else I tried to do in my business. I found it hard to write any new content, I struggled to feel confident before a coaching session because my head felt foggy. I seriously believe that my block on being visible was causing me blocks everywhere in life. It was all a bit miserable. However, I have great news - I’m not stuck anymore! Very recently, I confidently and happily posted my first video on facebook! Now, here I am feeling relieved & creatively free, cracking on with my website blog in a way that I’ve dreamt of doing for months! So how did I get to this point, after being so incredibly blocked?! I’ve listed some of the key moments below that happened to help me turn it around, but before I get to that - if any of this resonates with you and you think you might be stuck on something too, start by dealing with the first 3 key points below: Acknowledge that you are actually stuck! If you are putting something off that deep down know you need to face up to doing..but you’re struggling to make any progression...then acknowledge that that is you being a bit stuck! Maybe you’ve not even realised it until now! Here’s some signs you’ve got a bit of 'stuckness' on something:
Find out why. Find a quiet moment when you can sit down with pen and paper, and ask yourself why you are stalling. Leave the excuses out of it and just be honest with yourself. There might be one reason, or there might be multiple reasons - note down anything that comes up for you! Actually writing it all down can really help you just find some much needed clarity, without that it’s extremely hard to make any progress! Consider if your 'stuckness' is actually because you’re trying to do something that isn’t right for you. With my blockage around doing videos, I knew I had to get over it because... I love coaching! Putting videos out there is one of the best ways to get new clients to decide they want to work with you (especially during a pandemic lockdown where we can’t meet in person) so it felt like a bit of a no-brainer. My desire to succeed in coaching far outweighed my fear of doing a video, so I knew I had to persevere and find a way to push through it. If you are stuck on something that you don’t want, or don’t care much about - ask yourself if it’s really absolutely necessary that you do the thing in the first place. Or, if the situation really is unavoidable, can you see another way to resolve it that doesn’t cause you to feel stuck? So what about the process I went through to 'unstick' around my fear of being visible in a video? I've listed the 6 key areas that helped me move forwards below. These did not necessarily all neatly flow in the below order - it was more a case of everything coming together at once, the below were the critical elements though. 1) I eventually realised I had to do it my own unique way. You’d think this would be a given, because by being me, surely I can only produce things in my own unique way...but no! Turns out I was trying to do what I thought I saw others doing, and that meant I missed out on just bringing my own natural style. I felt awkward and it just didn’t flow for me. Due to that the videos I tried doing were ok, but I never felt happy enough to actually post them on social media. The first major breakthrough was realising that the real issue was figuring out how to be me on camera - not me trying to remember how someone else might do it! The second breakthrough was actually figuring out what ‘being me’ in a video actually meant! I had to give some thought to how I am in real life. If someone was in the room with me instead of that video camera, then I realised I would never feel comfortable pretending I’m ok when I’m not. In real life, if I feel uncomfortable I admit to it! That quickly led to the idea that my first video needed to go back to basics and actually just be about me talking about my struggle with producing a video! As soon as I hit on that idea, the whole process just flowed so easily and before I knew it, I was happily hitting ‘post’ on my first ever social media video for my business! 2) I dedicated time to working out the technical stuff like the equipment I was going to use, and didn't give up until I had a solution that worked. I got a lot quicker at this once I had resolved point 1, because as soon as I felt confident on what the content of my video would be, I felt excited and motivated to get the technical stuff right so I could just get on with it! 3) I studied my idols to see how they did videos and copied some of their techniques! This point obviously works in combination with point 1 - watch and see how the people you like watching are doing it, then find a way to bring your own unique twist to that! 4) I gave up on the pursuit of perfection. If you want & need to get past a block, then you might have to aim for ‘good enough’ instead of ‘perfect’. Seeking perfection is something we often do when we are lacking confidence and potentially doubting our own worth. It’s just another form of procrastination. Are you setting standards that - if you’re honest with yourself - you’re going to seriously struggle to ever achieve? Wouldn’t you feel happier if you just got the ‘stuck thing’ done to a ‘very good’ level - instead of a perfect one? Surely not having it hanging over you as a big-grey-not-done-that-yet-cloud, combined with an amazing sense of achievement once it’s actually completed is an exciting thing to aim for, simply because it’s attainable! I felt that I achieved a kind of perfection when I made the decision to post an imperfect video out into the world - because any kind of perfection for me, needs to involve me actually progressing in my business! Could just actually getting the thing done become part of your view of it being ‘perfect’? 5) I stayed accountable to my coach! I don’t say this to create some cheesy link to then ask you to sign me up as your coach (that comes later….haaaa!) it really is just true that my coach, Joy, set a date by when I would have a video posted out there. Having a challenge with a deadline set like that, where you have to report back to someone you respect, can have a major effect on your chance of actually getting something done. Don’t underestimate accountability - sometimes it is the only driving force that will get you past your own blocks 6) The universe had my back! I quite literally pulled this card twice in a row from my ‘The universe has your back’ cards by Gabrielle Bernstein on two different days in the build up to doing my ‘unstuck’ video which felt like a fab sign to go ahead! I love tuning into signs that I’m on the right track. It can be anything from white feathers, to angel numbers or number plates on cars that you suddenly spot! Look for signs in your life that there is love and support around you, ready for you to take your next step If you are feeling stuck in your business and you just don’t know how to shift into a different gear to get through it, why not book in a discovery call with me! Money breakthrough coaching is all about getting free of old beliefs that hold us back. The focus is on moving our business and ourselves forward in life and ultimately making more money and creating more freedom to spend time doing the things we love! That dream life really can be yours! Book a discovery call using the button below, or email me at [email protected] I can't wait to hear from you! With love, Nikki x |
AuthorWritten by Nikki T, I blog about anything & everything related to clarity, confidence & money breakthroughs! Archives
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